After a break up, one can feel a lot of things: release, freedom, independence, cynical, emotional and ultimately have a sense of loneliness and misplacement. This depends entirely on the lost relationship, how long it lasted, how it ended and entirely on what kind of person you are.
Within the first month, most people feel lost, especially if you’ve just got out of a particularly long relationship. More often than not your ‘friends’ will begin to start telling you the truth about your ex and a feeling of sadness can begin to surface, you may even begin to feel like a complete idiot; again for numerous reasons.
Sometime later you may find your friends and family aren’t filling the void and the comfort and safety you felt in your past relationship is ultimately gone, you then will have a sense of realism; you’re on your own now!
Occasionally (possibly after a few drinks) you may experience a sense of empowerment, this can be triggered from special attention from the attractive and witty, compliments or success in other forms, however like every single person you will undoubtedly have droughts of loneliness, insatiable loneliness that often feels like it is consuming you.
The loneliness will eventually be then worsened by the irritating ‘itch’ that has come about from you recent rift into unwilled celibacy. This then not only affects your head, but your heart.
It is a bold truth that at some point in every person’s life they realise that they cannot walk the lonely thread of life without a companion, it is perhaps to great a ‘burden’ to bare on their own.
Perhaps, one night you have had a few more vodka cokes than usual and one particular person is offering you their utmost affectionate and caring attention.
Not perhaps a complete stranger, but this has been known to happen. The evening continues and you seem to have a great deal in common. Then, before your know it your back at their place and heaven has opened!
The next day, you have a hangover, you’re in shock and perhaps even a little confused (depending on the alcohol consumption), you believe you have just encountered your first one night stand, either for the first time or the first time after your last relationship has ended.
Ok, so it’s a mistake, job done, never talk about it again and if you see them out and about- play it cool!
But hang on...what’s this? They want to see you again? And you’ve said yes!
Enter the reboundmentship! And oh what heavy territory you have just entered.
A reboundmentship is fine, if anything you can call it an interesting time in your life, but please take the concept of ‘interesting’ very loosely.
Something’s you must understand about a reboundmentship:
•You haven’t gotten over your ex
•You are only doing this because you can neither bare nor handle loneliness anymore
•You are very likely to fall for him/her
•You are very likely to get hurt
•This is not officially a couple relationship, nor is it a FB situation (well from your point of view anyway).
So your options are quite simple, play the ice king/queen card and carry on and try not to arouse any feelings, especially if you’re a girl (although apparently that scientifically impossible) or break it off and try and stay friends.
Simple right? Right?...WRONG! Add other people to the fold, family members, nosey bystanders and concerned friends and you ultimately have pandemonium. But hey, when did I ever say life was easy, I said it was interesting.
